A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation, among other functions. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F's": 1. fighting; 2. fleeing; 3.feeding; and 4. mating. - Psychology professor
A three line PERL script that implements RSA public key encryption TRY: echo squeamish ossifrage - rsa -e 3 7537d365 - rsa -d 4e243e33 7537d365 #!/usr/local/bin/perl -s-- -export-a-crypto-system-sig -RSA-in-3-lines-PERL ($k,$n)=@ARGV;$m=unpack(H.$w,$m."\0"x$w),$_=`echo "16do$w 2+4Oi0$d*-^1[d2% Sa2/d0
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. - Oscar Wilde
What is a committee? A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary. - Richard Harkness, _The New York Times_, 1960
Teach a man to fish, he'll eat fish the rest of his life.
Teach a fish to learn, and soon the fish will all be running around in schools!
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I've watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All these moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. - Roy Baty
Slogan of 105.9, the classic rock radio station in Chicago: "Of all the radio stations in Chicago...we're one of them."
With every passing hour our solar system comes forty-three thousand miles closer to globular cluster M13 in the constellation Hercules, and still there are some misfits who continue to insist that there is no such thing as progress. - Ransom K. Ferm
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.
Applying computer technology is simply finding the right wrench to pound in the correct screw.
It is possible for your mind to be so open that your brain falls out.
The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"
Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world. - Dave Barry
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. - A. Whitney Brown
A democracy cannot exist as a permanent form of government. It can only exist until a majority of voters discover that they can vote themselves largess out of the public treasury. - Alexander Tyler, eighteenth-century Scottish historian
A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. - William James
Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station wagon full of tapes hurtling down the highway. - Andrew Tannenbaum
We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it---and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again---and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore. - Mark Twain
The Lord's Prayer is 66 words, the Gettysburg Address is 286 words, there are 1,322 words in the Declaration of Independence, but government regulations on the sale of cabbage total 26,911 words. - Article on growth of federal regulations
A Stanford research group advertised for participants in a study of obsessive- waste tears on what might have been. Just lie on your back and float.
Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.
There's an old story about the person who wished his computer were as easy to use as his telephone. That wish has come true, since I no longer know how to use my telephone. - Stroustrup
I am Homer of Borg! Prepare to be... Ooooooo! Donuts!
Courteous Postal Workers: A. Always have stamps on hand. B. Are kind, courteous, and patient with customers. C. Save the last bullet for themselves.
Half of the people in the world are below average.
There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets? - Dick Cavett, mocking the TV-violence debate
Life in a vacuum sucks.
What method does Kurt Cobain use to collect his thoughts? A spatula.
The number you have dialed is imaginary. Please divide by 0 and try again.
I still miss my ex-wife, but my aim is getting better.
If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base. - Dave Barry
I am sick unto death of obscure english towns that exist seemingly for the sole accommodation of these so-called limerick writers---and even sicker of their residents, all of whom suffer from physical deformities and spend their time dismembering relatives at fancy dress balls. - Editor of the Limerick Times (Limerick, Ireland)
When cryptography is outlawed, bayl bhgynjf jvyy unir cevinpl.
Lazlo's Chinese Relativity Axiom: No matter how great your triumphs or how tragic your defeats---approximately one billion Chinese couldn't care less.
668: The Neighbor of the Beast
Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps. - Emo Phillips
Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.
Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you recognize a mistake when you make it again. - F. P. Jones
Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. - Douglas Adams
No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man. - Heraclitas
C code. C code run. Run, code, run!
But as he knew no bad language, he had called him all the names of common objects that he could think of, and had screamed: "You lamp! You towel! You plate!" and so on. - Sigmund Freud
These are my new shoes. They're good shoes. They won't make you rich like me, they won't make you rebound like me, they definitely won't make you handsome like me. They'll only make you have shoes like me. That's it. - Charles Barkley
"Life without you would be like a broken pencil." "How's that?" "Completely pointless." - Blackadder, Series II
On a tombstone: "I TOLD YOU I WAS SICK"
As your attorney, it is my duty to inform you that it is not important that you understand what I'm doing or why you're paying me so much money. What's important is that you continue to do so. - Hunter S. Thompson's Samoan Attorney
When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, "Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?" - Quentin Crisp
Confucius say too much. - Recent Chinese proverb